Friday, December 23, 2011

pinterested?

So there's a new fad out there. Pinterest. I first heard about it on Facebook. No wait, it was someone tweeting about a Facebook post, talking about a blog, that got an idea from Pinterest. Wait, maybe someone was blogging about a tweet they found on pinterests facebook page? I don't know, too many damn social networks these days. Anyways, Pinterest is sweeping the female nation.

I hardly know anything about the site. From my understanding, (because I'm too proud to actually visit the site) it's like a giant relief society meeting where girls get together and talk about "cute" ideas for decorating, cooking, scrapbooking etc. I've seen my friend Cora on it once, and it just seemed like it was for girls who wanted ideas for some activity you learn in home economics. Don't get me wrong, I'm not bashing on the site, my question is, why? Can't you just google stuff you want to know about? When did google become so inefficient that you have to dedicate another site to finding things on google, then duplicate them on a digital wall. (I'm being informed that it's actually called a "cork board.")

Well because here in America we believe in equal opportunity, or at least the civil rights people say so, I have decided that I'm going to start a guys version of this site. It will be called "mancation" An entire site dedicated to stuff just us guys talk about: chest hair, cleats, elbow grease, the hot girl next door, spitting, scratching etc. This site is gonna blow pinterest away! Instead of a "cork board" we will have a dart board, and instead of "cute" ideas for weddings, birthdays and other gala events; we will have the cheats to Contra, what is the best Charcoal for grillin, the schedule/time/TV station for every football, baseball, basketball game, who the new Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders are, and where the closest camping spots are.

As you can tell, this site is gonna be awesome. So what do you think? Mantriguing right!? Oh by the way, Mormonism, all true; every single word.

Monday, December 19, 2011

the most wonderful time of the year

Yep, it's that time of year. Christmas music has been playing since Halloween in the local Wal-Mart. You've gone on like 4 dates to make gingerbread houses and haven't eaten even one of them. Cold has been a constant, and snow a slightly less constant. Christmas lights all over everywhere. You probably still don't know what to get your Dad for Christmas. You notice that everyone seems to be in a relationship and you are starting to realize you'll have nobody again for New Years' and are hoping to get lucky.

Christmas is an amazing time of the year. The build-up to December 25th, even better. For me, the preparations and all the fun stuff beforehand is way better. Christmas day usually entails my 11 year old sister waking me up at 3am to tell me Santa came and to check out my stocking. Getting up at 7 am dead tired from not sleeping enough during the night, then having to clean up the house so my cousins don't come over to a "pigsty" for our Christmas dinner. Don't get me wrong, I still love presents, eggnog, and everything else the day brings, but the buildup is way more fun to me. Now that finals are over and my brain can relax, here's "Christmas movies survival guide to Christmas"

1- Careful not to wish your family would disappear. It might come true.

2- Carry syrup with you at all times. You never know when you'll need it.

3- Go have a snowball fight.

4- If you are bored, go ask someone to get food. You know. "the code."

5- Sweaters that light up are a must have for any Christmas party.


6- The best way to spread Christmas Cheer, is singing loud for all to hear.

7- Watch out for yellow cars. They don't stop.

8- Don't get overbooked. If you get invited to the Whobilation, you don't want to end up like the Grinch.