Tuesday, May 22, 2012

a cautionary tale

Once upon a time, a young prince was out in the woods at the beginning of summer. He had just finished hunting with other noblemen and they were just sitting down to eat what they had killed. The warrior looked up and noticed a fair maiden across the woods picking berries. He thought "how peculiar, this striking woman is by herself! Where is her mate?" He approached the young maiden and discovered that she belonged to his kingdom, and spent most meals alone. She found favor in his sight by her beauty; so he mustered up the courage and asked if she would care to join him and the noblemen for some food. She accepted and they began to court one another.

At once the young lady began to respond to questions directed at the young prince. Acting as if they had known each other for many moons. She began to post cliche and obnoxious love quote proclamations in the town square for all to see. Many times she mentioned how former maidens that had lived with her, hated her.

After only a few days, she refused to participate in towne festivities, including such things as the beloved "sand volleyball."  Only days after their meeting she began to command this prince and intend to direct his activities! The audacity!

However, she was a beautiful young lass. He decided to  continue this relationship to see if she would improve her behavior. Many other pretty girls were presented to the young prince, however, he felt trapped and was unable to pursue new relationships. As time passed he realized his mistake, and was able to escape the awful grasp of the young maiden. However, the tragedy of wasting so much time with her, had ruined his summer. Ah well, he would go back to university in the fall, and perhaps find favor with another, less awful maiden.

In case you didn't pick up on that, these are red flags. Things that girls and guys alike might do, that can be indicators that a relationship with them will suck. Most of these things I have either experienced or seen friends go thru. Moral of the story? Don't waste your summer on a social retard who annoys you just cuz they are hot. Oh and just FYI, I was not the young prince.